A Contrast in Comfort

I hate where I live. It's disgusting, moldy, suffocating, and unsafe. But I've become tolerant or, more accurately, adapted to this environment, which is awful and should be unacceptable. I'm okay in confined spaces, so I never realize how detrimental it is for my well-being to stay hidden in my room. I'm in such a constant state of stress that I seem to not realize when I should be unwinding. A contrast usually has to exist in order for me to recognize it.

Recently I've realized how much I truly hate where I live. I express how awful it is through empty words that can never truly encompass the actual experience, but I've experienced a significant contrast in comfort. For the past two consecutive days, I've stayed at, my friend's place during the day and took a shower there. What a difference it makes!

It's such a beautiful home. I personally wouldn't live there because it isn't me, but I think that allows me to appreciate it more. I have realized, though, that since I've changed, I would incorporate some of the features that exist in his house. That would've never been the case even last year! There are huge windows that allow natural light to shoot through. The bathroom has bright white curtains and huge windows that fill up the space of the wall. It's very much a minimalist's home. There's this amazing art piece. It's this intense orangish-red called the Ring of Fire. It looks like a C-shape. There's a small green tree that's growing as the fire's nearing it. But I see it as the tree's life is so powerful that it's blowing the fire away. Some people see it as the fire is destroying the tree. The flames are moving away! I love what it represents and that it embodies his mission and his universal philosophy.

I love my taste in artwork, but it's a lot more one-dimensional compared to who I am. So when I see artwork like that, I just fall in love. Outside he has reclining seats I lounge in and sunbathe in. It's amazing! It's refreshing to shower in such a spacious and clean area. The natural light is therapeutic. But it makes me realize how much I need to move. He once told me that even if I can tolerate something, it doesn't mean that I should. It's so true! The contrast in comfort is both a blessing and a curse. It makes it more difficult and painful to deal with where I live. It's good to get out of your natural element.