A Failed Understanding of Failures

This is the first time I’ve really had opportunities to make mistakes and live with the consequences. In the past, I was forced to deal with my consequences. But so much was at stake that I didn’t make as many risks, which resulted in fewer failures. As much as I advocate for the necessity of failures because of the life lessons we’re left with, I found myself taking this belief to a logical extreme. Budgeting oversights has eaten away at my money. If I created a list of items I had to get and I underestimated, I was left with less money, sometimes a few days worth of food. My boyfriend would be more than willing to provide me with some money, but I didn’t ask for his help. I saw that as rewarding me for my mistakes. It wasn’t until he realized how undernourished I was that this all became clear to me. I could sustain some skipped meals, and it’s the consequence I would have to pay for lost money is and was my perspective, a disturbing one at that. Failures can be helpful, if and when you reflect on them productively, not when you use your failures as a way to perpetuate the problem or create new ones.